February 28, 2015

Hi everybody. Welcome to my blog where I talk about my present. My present with traumatic brain injury. I'll make it kind of short.

You know what drives me crazy is when someone like my friend shows up really grumpy. He was telling me his problems. Now, I know people don't want to hear this, it's a bit of a cliche, but when someone shows up telling me about their problems like, they stubbed their toe, or something like that, it kind of drives me crazy. I always think maybe I should take this guy to Unit 6A at the hospital and show him people with real problems. You know, there were people I used to hang out with, people that will never get better. You know, people with big problems. Anyway, I just wanted to get that off my chest. You know, get up on my soap box and preach.

It's been a strange week. You know, every day is different. I go to sleep thinking Gee, I wonder what tomorrow will bring. I've been fighting this whole situation for almost 6 years. But, things are becoming more and more clear. I can't describe it, and I think I already did, but it feels bizarre. It's like I said before. It's a never-ending wake up.

You know what's kind of cool is I've been starting to strum my guitar. A local musical gave me a strap to hold the guitar around me and I managed to strum it. I think I'll even give you a song next week. Something to look forward to, right? It'll probably be the scariest video you've ever seen, but hey, what the hell. I'm gonna leave it at that because there's not much more to tell. Actually, I am going to benchmark where I am cause it's cool to look back at previous blogs and you know, see where I'm at.

Right now I still feel like my face is covered in gaffer tape. I can't walk. I'm still in the wheel chair. I can drink, but through a straw. I still have to be fed by hand. I can drive. Just kidding. I wanted to see if you're paying attention. I can't sit up. But little things like, playing the guitar, strumming the guitar and painting are huge steps for me. I am improving but it's taking so long. My eyesight is getting better. I still see double though and my eyes move constantly. I'm basically still a mess. But, it's not so bad.

This is B. Nice signing off from Ice Station Zebra (man it's viking cold here!). Here's my link to my blog about the past. Love, B. Nice

February 20, 2015

Hi you guys. Welcome to my blog where I talk about the present. You know, how I live with traumatic brain injury.

OMG! I couldn't figure out why I felt so elated when they wheeled me to the car through the snow. I felt great. I didn't know why and then I realized it was the first time I'd been out of the house in 3 weeks! I had been wheeling between my bedroom and the kitchen for 3 weeks. I guess normally a regular person would go a little crazy, but I have no gauge of time. It's hard to explain, but it feels like I had my last operation a few months ago. It's been almost 6 years. So you see what I mean. Just another benefit of having a traumatic brain injury. I could have an awesome CD collection. I could pick one out and think "Wow! I've never seen this before!"

You know, I was reading some past blogs I did and I came upon the one I was going to do on February 14th, valentine's day. I forgot to mention something. I wanted to send it to my daughter so if anyone talks to her, can you forward this to her. I was going to say, "You know, everybody's different. How boring would the world be if we were all the same. But there's one thing that we all share and we all feel love. So on this Valentine's Day, my love for my daughter is a little brighter."

Anyway, that's it. If you see her, give her that message. Oh yeah, and tell her not to eat all the chocolate she got, cause I want some.

Oh yeah, you know what I want to mention to you? You gotta make sure you got a great social worker. I do and it's so important. My social worker has a lot of cases, but she seems to get a lot done for me. You know, I have my mom who looks after me, but my social worker takes care of all the other stuff, like getting equipment. It's really important. Just thought I'd share that with you.

You know, I've said it over and over, but you've got to treat this traumatic brain injury like a job. It's sunrise to sunset of therapy. It's your job to get better. If you look at it that way, it'll make things a lot easier. I mean, just doing this blog is good for my memory. It brings up some good stuff and not so good stuff. Anyway, that's about it for this week. I'm gonna go back to staring at the snow. We've had a record amount of snow here. If the roof doesn't collapse, I'll blog to you next week.

This is B. Nice signing off from Ice Station Zebra. Here the link to my blog where I talk about the past. Love, B. Nice

February 17, 2015

Hi everybody. I was going to blog to you on St. Valentine's Day, you know, February 14th, but we got snowed in. I'm gonna blog to you today.

You know, just the opposite of love, positive vibes, you know, stuff like that is negative vibes and that is the last thing you need to be around when you have a traumatic brain injury. It's all a bit of a cliche but you have to surround yourself with positive energy. If there's any kind of negativeness, you know, like the news or people talking negatively, it can really bring you down. In my case it can trigger auras. I therefore try to surround myself with positive stuff. Just an observation. I therefore have one thing to say to you guys, "I love you Man!" That's all I have to say. Have a great Valentine's Day. Make it a year actually.

Love, B. Nice

Don't forget to check out my blog from the past (little story there for you).

February 6, 2015

Hi you guys, welcome to the blog where I talk about the present. It's presently sunny here, but man, it's cold. Another snow storm is coming. I've been locked up in this house for like 3 weeks. I'm getting cabin fever and the dog is talking to me. Just kidding. I am getting cabin fever though. And let me tell you, stress definitely affects you when you have traumatic brain injury. I'm gonna leave it at that. Not much has changed, just ready to go for another cross country trip. I'll talk to you guys before Valentine's Day, but I hope you have a great week. I'll leave you with some photos and a link to my blog where I talk about the past. Check it out. It's kind of funny. Love, B. Nice

Oh yeah, a family friend asked me to do a portrait on the porch of my parents. Kind of cool. See you next week. Love, B. Nice

January 31, 2015

Hi. Welcome to my blog where I talk about the present. I'm gonna do things a little differently. I'm gonna mix the past with the present. Above is a photo I took of me at the beach one day. I used to drive on the beach with my dog. I picked out a good place on the ocean to windsurf. I would pick out a nice fiberglass board, you know, like 8'6", and go out on the ocean in the waves. It was total freedom. Very much opposite to how my life is right now. I mean, people have to feed me, shower me, carry me into bed. Let's just say, it's much less than total freedom. When you have a traumatic brain injury you basically turn into a stone, a stone that eats and shits. I am getting better though. I have a therapist coming twice a week to teach me how to feed myself. You know, become a little more independent. It feels great. Going back to windsurfing, cause I love to talk about it, windsurfing got me back into surfing again. Let me tell you when you're on a board going through waves, big waves, they don't seem so big when you're standing up. But when you're on your belly paddling on your surfboard, a big wave looks humongous. I guess that's kind of like life right now. It all depends on how you look at things and how you approach them. That's my profound thought of the week.

You know, it's been really cold here. I've been inside a lot. Having someone take you out of the house just for a couple of minutes helps a lot. And if someone takes you out to, let's say lunch, it helps so much. Otherwise you get a little cabin fever. Just an observation.

One other thing that's been happening is I've been getting more and more of what I call moments. I guess you could also call them auras. But they are different. They're shorter. So I guess that's a good thing. I've also been waking up feeling remarkably different each day. Like, today I feel like hell but I feel very focused. It's bizarre. Remember, you just go with the flow. Don't freak out.

That's about it for this week. Not much else to report. Oh yeah, one other thing. I keep waking up in the middle of the night wanting to put on a dress and some heavy make up. Just kidding. I wanted to see if you were paying attention. Talk to you next week. Love, B. Nice

Here's a link to my other blog.